Day 95

DAILY SHOW

It's Monday night and, in the first nomination announcement, Camilla has miraculously escaped.

Her respite is short-lived however, as Jamie exercises the 3-point twist on himself, saving him but putting Camilla up.

Princess Fiona goes into the diary room for her usual, let's-influence-the-eviction chat with BB. Her targets this week are Chris and Max. 'As much as I think they are both fantastic'.' Long-winded bullflop made short, she doesn't want them to win because her, David and Jamie have 'earned' the winner's prize.

Jamie and Chris are talking in the bedroom. Jamie says he's not interested in winning. Yeah right! So why did you save yourself then' If you're not interested in winning, why would you have cared enough to save yourself'

He then goes on to talk about how there must be another full week in the house at the very least. Once again, for someone who speaks about how disinterested he is in the game, he sure is paying a lot of attention to it.

They are joined by Camilla, Max and David. Camilla is thrilled that 'I got to live my BB dream' Max congratulates Jamie but Jamie is unhappy with all the attention. After deducting the 3 points from himself, Jamie knows the key to success is to lay low and let the others take all the attention.

Later, in the lounge, Jamie is talking about an ex-girlfriend. Camilla advises him, given all of his relationship problems, to be 'single for a while'.

For some inexplicable reason, these comments enrage Chris who goes on the attack. 'I think the way you put your opinion across is very much this is how it is supposed to be'.

Unable to keep it real and honest, Camilla just laughs patronisingly at him. This does not deter Chris. 'You don't know shit about it'. You're just being a twat'.

They continue to bicker about nothing in particular:

'I didn't hear anything but shit coming out of your mouth'.

'You don't have to be unkind to me'.

'Laugh at yourself, you're not that good darling'.

Now I don't agree with why Chris started this argument but I do like that he actually confronted Camilla. Being confronted always spooks Camilla who is very used to saying what she wants, but doesn't always appreciate the same honesty in return.

Later, Max and Jamie compliment Chris on his performance. 'That was pretty entertaining' says Jamie.

Camilla, meanwhile, is licking her wounds in the bedroom. David joins her. She tells him that she's attracted to Chris but also offended by his behaviour. 'It just makes him look young and stupid'. I wonder if Camilla ever thinks that she might come across the same way'

In the lounge room, Max reckons that Chris just has to say something funny and Camilla will forgive him. 'I think she loves your sense of humour' says Max. She's a good girl' says Chris.

Jamie is trying to make amends in the bathroom with Camilla, after not sticking up for her earlier. He advises her that she just go out to the lounge and forget about it. However, forgiveness will not be easy. Camilla climbs back into bed with David.

NOMINATIONS

On stage from the start are Claire and Krystal. Krystal is dressed like a lady who lunches in between visits from clients. She's wearing a polka dot top about three sizes too small, dark blue jeans and white sandal heels.

Claire isn't much better and looks like toothpaste that has tried to be pushed back into the tube.

Camilla

2pts: Max for strategic reasons, she blames him for Claire and Krystal's eviction, 'enormous competition this late in the game'.

1pt: Chris for strategic reasons, frustrated that Chris came back into the house at the expense of Claire and Krystal.

Chris

2pts: Max because he is Chris' greatest competition.

1pt: David. Good little Jamie minion. Well done. Thinks David got rude at the family dinner.

Jamie

2pts: Max on the basis of strategy

1pt: Chris on the basis of strategy.

I told you guys he would nominate Chris again, all the while laying the groundwork for Chris to not nominate him (ie taking him to the Rewards Room). Jamie truly is the puppet master in this game. He has them all doing what he wants except for David whom he just targets with nasty remarks.

Max

2pts: Chris for 'strategical' reasons. Max has been taking lessons from

1pt: Camilla for her personality

David

2pts: Jamie ' hardly helps with the chores around the house

1pt: Chris for a similar reason, hardly does any dishes, talks too much when he's drunk

It's time for the first nomination announcement. The housemates up for eviction are: Max, Chris and Jamie.

Who will Jamie save' Himself' He saves himself.

The housemates up for nomination are: Max, Chris, Camilla and David.

Day 96

DAILY SHOW

It's early morning and David is speculating to Max that a celebrity will be coming into the house. He hopes it is Kylie Minogue. He asks Max who his 'dream celebrity' would be. Max says Cameron Diaz. 'I think she's just gorgeous'.

In the bedroom, Camilla says she misses the girls. Jamie promises to be as girly as he can be. This should not be a stretch. Now that Krystal is gone, he spends the most time gazing at himself in the mirror.

Camilla muses to Jamie that she won't be getting an apology from Chris anytime soon. I wander if Darren ever considers when he will get an apology from Camilla. She wanders outside and lies in a hammock.

Chris emerges from the shower and goes to do some washing. Speaking of which, has anyone spotted Jamie's beige trousers lately' Maybe BB has removed them from the house. We can only hope because those slacks were going to

Camilla watches Chris however he does not appear to initiate conversation. Chris is a bit of an arsehole. I don't know what his mother is like, but she really failed in raising a respectful human being. As deserving as Camilla is of a dressing down, there is no need to be so nasty about it. He's no better than her.

In the lounge room, Jamie asks David what he knows about the fallout between Camilla and Chris. 'Chris is a wanker' says David.

'What do you think or what do you know' Max asks of Jamie. Jamie avoids saying anything by using the excuse of not wanting to betraying trust when, in the past, he's never had a problem revealing housemate discussions.

It seems, however, that Chris needn't apologise. As he lies on some of the 'poofs' (yeah I don't know the technical term for them), she sidles up and sits next to him. He rolls over and she catches him. Peace reigns again in the house.

This is the second time Chris has had a go but Camilla instantly forgives him even when he does not ask for forgiveness. Given she despised Darren for doing a lot less, it's strange and confusing behaviour.

The housemates are told about this week's task. They are to create a dominoe effect from household items. Hey that's what we can use Jamie's beige slacks for! They're probably as stiff as a board by now.

On the couch, Camilla and Chris are leaning on each other. Camilla rubs his arm and tickles his ear. What happened to her not talking to Chris until she got an apology'

BB informs the housemates that the storeroom is now open. They find the storeroom full of items they can use in this week's task. They start to build but Max continues to knock his tiles over.

Jamie talks about his family. He reckons his mum is a strong female and he has always been close to her. He then says David reminds him of his dad due to his need for order.

Camilla continues the eviction campaign against Max and Chris by telling Jamie and David that she wants them to be the final three. Click your heels witchy-poo and it may just happen.

In the diary room, Chris is talking to BB about the fallout between him and Camilla. 'It will always be like that. Camilla and I will love and hate each other'. He then says that, as much as Camilla whinges about it, she is glad to be the final female in the house. 'She's the only female getting attention from the boys'.

Camilla has gotten changed in order to do some exercise. She has the most painful looking camel toe going on, leading me to reminisce about one of the best lines from a song ever (Cameltoe by Fanny Pack) - 'Is your crotch hungry girl, cos it's eating your pants'. In which case, Camilla's pants appear starved.

Jamie and David continue to chat. Jamie though gets clumsy and drops a pillow, which lands on the dominies, leading to the decimation of hours of work.

Camilla and Jamie are in the gym. Camilla asks Jamie 'Do you think I'm up myself'' 'No', Jamie wisely responds. He does mention, though, that Camilla is kind to those she wants to be but is 'strong' with those that she dislikes.

It's bedtime and the housemates are winding down. Camilla asks Chris 'When are you going to come visit me in my bed''

Out of nowhere, David asks the other housemates if they've noticed that 20% of the people in the house are gay. David is so random sometimes. He's also very very hot.

As Camilla and Chris dance around the topic of bed sharing, he tells them to do get it over with and do the 'bed hop'. Chris pulls Camilla into his bed with an enticing 'Come into my fart world'.

Ah Chris, you didn't think you'd get off that easily did you. Camilla immediately asks for an apology but there is nothing coming. He continues to argue back with her over her behaviour.

Camilla gets up and goes back to her own bed. It's a stalemate. It's broken, however, by Chris climbing into Camilla's bed. I think that's the closest to an apology Camilla is going to get.

EVICTION

Big Brother tells the nominated housemates to pack their bags, as there will be an eviction in five minutes. The housemates are galvanised into action.

It's time for the meet the family and friends discussion. Oh god, why' Max's sister, Rebecca, reckons the family is going 'crazy'. Lucy, Chris' sister, appears unwell and pale. She needs a meal. Joanne, David's sister, is adopted cos she looks nothing like her brother. Joelene, Camilla's mate, is not sure of her mate's relationship with Chris.

It's time to go'.. Chris.

As he wanders out to the golf cart, I finally figure out that Chris looks like the type of guy who ignores waiters at restaurants and doesn't tip.

On stage, we look at the tally and find that Chris was evicted with 69% of the vote. He reckons that David and Max nominated him. However, all the housemates nominated him.

'You were very brave going in there' Gretel says about coming in so late as a housemate, especially as the remaining housemates didn't want them. However, at first at least, the housemates all liked him. 'He seems to have slotted into the house very well' says David.

We see Chris being offensive, starting with the 'fat girls with confidence' remark. The housemates originally find it funny but seem somewhat offended later. Max however, found it offensive from the start.

Then there is the 'If you were desperate, you'd be in Max' bed' comment. Can I ask, is there anyone else on this earth that is so nasty just because it's something to do' Besides Gretel.

It's time to talk about the relationship with Camilla. Gretel asks if it was a game plan to align himself with Camilla. He says no. He figured he would like her and he did. He doesn't know if they would have a relationship outside of the BB house. 'Who knows''

We see the housemates muse about the arguments between Camilla and Chris. It seems fiery, confrontational and pointless. If I were in the house, I would put laxatives in their food. They're giving me the shits. They may as well get some themselves.

Chris reckons he is Australia's best kisser. Not with those manky yellow teeth he isn't.

It's time for the 10 BB Questions:

Worst thing: aerobics

Miss the most: mobile phone

Favourite person: Camilla, Jamie and Claire

Least favourite person: Little Darren

Most annoying habit: BB taking their balls away

Funniest: Jamie, Krystal, Max

Playing the game: David

Gretel is prodding Chris for further information and putting words in his mouth about David. Ok, I think we're clear that BB doesn't want David to win. Jamie will win BB06, guaranteed.

Best thing: food

Out next: Max

Want to win: Camilla or Jamie

Viewer question: Do you think you would have lasted to the final week if you'd been an original housemate' 'Who knows what it would have been like'

It's time for the prizes. Phones, eyecam, holiday, $5000 cash, Citroen C4. Not bad for three weeks holiday. There's some strange woman in his car. Why isn't security there' Oh ok, it's mum.

Back to the house and BB calls all the housemates to the lounge. Camilla is not wearing undies and hurriedly pulls on a grey g-string. BB housemates informs the housemates that they are the final four and all are up for eviction.

BB decides to influence our voting though by looking at the housemates' promises before the house and in the house.

Max appears to have very traditional views about women. He says he can't imagine his wife leading the life he leads now. In the diary room, Max is talking non-stop. He feels good about being up for eviction.

Now David. We see his revelation about being gay and his view that being in the BB house is not about being stronger than anyone else ' it's about personality. In the diary room, he says the housemates knew something was going on.

Gretel is getting ticked that the housemates knew what was going on, despite her valiant efforts to encourage them to pretend it was all a surprise.

We see Jamie in audition and promising that he will bitch a lot. Well he lived up to that. Jamie appears to be one of those housemates that promised a lot but delivered very little except important lessons in hygiene.

In the diary room, he talks about how he is missing clothes. 'I've gotta buy new clothes'. Just wash the ones you've got you filthy little goblin.

Camilla's audition is just like Camilla in real life. She says she is bossy, demanding and high maintenance. She has just gotten a fine for changing out of her pink dress and leaving her microphone off.

And that's done. That eviction show was worse than Danielle's eviction. Why does BB hurt me so'

Day 97

DAILY SHOW
Cabin fever is rife in the BB house. David, Jamie and Max are out in the kitchen, talking and laughing about nothing in particular.

They are joined by Chris, after he has positioned and repositioned his beanie and pouted in front of the mirror in the bedroom. Camilla soon follows him into the kitchen.

Eventually David bores of the conversation about nothing and excuses himself to go to bed, with the excuse of 'I'm crook as a dog'.

Later, Jamie goes into the bedroom. David is gazing at his picture of Sherif. Camilla follows Jamie and talks about Chris. She says she is proud that she hasn't changed her behaviour for anyone in the house.

Really' Camilla could barely tolerate Darren even breathing the same air as her and yet Chris abuses her and calls her a twat and she not only tolerates it, but forgives without him needing to apologise.

It must be a slow day in the BB house because we then spend a minute watching David wrestle a shirt on. He manages to put his head and his left arm through the same hole, resulting in him writing around on the bed.

Outside, the quality of the conversation isn't any better. A foul smell abounds and, surprisingly it's not Jamie this time. Camilla quickly ascertains that Chris has a smelly belly button. I thought it might have been those manky teeth of his. 'That's gross' she says. Chris is not impressed with her observation.

This type of conversation is obviously annoying David who wanders into the diary room to talk to BB. He is annoyed that 99% of the house conversation is at a Grade 4 Level. 'If I was in Grade 4, I'd laugh too'.

Later, he wanders outside. Max asks where he has been. He says that he came out earlier but they were just telling old stories so he decided to disappear until new ones emerged. Max jokes and reveals there were new stories, leading David to pretend he was really upset.

BB breaks the Grade 4 stalemate by telling all housemates to work on their dominoe task. It's not an overly fruitful exercise. Both Camilla and Max knock things over, although Max manages to minimize some of the damage.

It's time for the Family Dinner. A question is asked about how it feels for the housemates to have two housemates still in the house. Camilla reckons she felt like someone had died. David meanwhile says he had mixed feelings as he wanted to Claire to win but didn't want Krystal to win. However, he tells both Chris and Max that they have a 'legitimate place in the BB game'.

During the dinner, the housemates start to hear noises coming from the outside. Recognising the noises as cheering coming from the auditorium, the housemates are galvanized and excited. Well, almost all of them. Jamie, the ultimate control freak, is clearly concerned about something happening beyond his control.

The housemates are then told there will be an eviction in five minutes. They race around, packing and getting dressed. On the couch and we're back to square one with Camilla and her public displayers of Cooterville. CLOSE YOUR GODDAMN LEGS.

It's time to go' Chris. Chris hugs the housemates, whilst looking at himself in the mirror, and then leaves.

David and Max reflect outside. Max says 'I can really see how much of a nice guy he was'.

Later, BB calls all the housemates to the lounge room. BB congratulations them for making it to the final four, and then informs them that they are all up for nomination. The housemates are in shock. Max doesn't rate his chances of winning but Camilla says 'Dude you have just as much chance of winning this as anybody else'. Not after Camilla starts her Anti-Max Campaign.

We end tonight with Jamie talking at length about how people think he is up himself. David observes that Jamie does tend to look in the mirror a lot. David then stirs the pot by saying that people who make entrances like Jamie does are up themselves because the way they act demands attention at the expense of everyone else.

Jamie is glaring daggers at David, although I think that, deep down, Jamie does recognize what David is saying. Jamie just hates being called on his behaviour.

Thankfully, we have Max the Hairy Backed Village Idiot to lighten the mood. He makes a remark about Jamie being very very ugly, resulting in a pillow fight.